Alright, I made it home. i'm sure many of you had your doubts that i would make it home. my california friends had doubts that i would ever want to leave.... But on my trip home, i had 50+ hours to myself, and did a lot of thinking. They're not very deep thoughts, but nonetheless, were somehow important enough, or funny enough, or just plain bizarre. So, here is what went on in my head for the last 3000 miles. I listened to books on tape, and plenty of radio shows, so this may or may not be inspired by shows or commercials i happened to listen to.
"Good Day!"
3000+ miles out, and the same back.
Had lots of things to keep me company on my ride back. Maps, Music, CellPhone, Books on tape, Radio. Had plenty of time to think, and tried to even take a photojournal with one of those cardboard cameras. some pictures came out, some didn't.
star sailing is the best sailing on the planet -- could be in alaska in december, and i would still love it. (even after getting my ass kicked in california)
I love my car. Very comfortable to drive. Very comfortable to sleep. Very user friendly. Survived 6000 miles towing my star. After 3+ years, i even learned how to use the trip computer to calculate my ETA to Medford, MA. Pretty damn cool if you ask me.
I'm the proud owner of a brand new battery.
In Greenup, Illinois, my car refused to start after filling up at an amoco station. After realizing that Saab Roadside assistance and AAA would be very time-consuming, and costly solutions, (because they both involved towing, and neither included the boat), i started looking around. Knowing that few in the middle of the country had ever seen a saab (none of the attendants at the gas station had ever heard of the automobile "what kindof car is THAT?"), i was worried that if the alternator, or starter was fried, i might be spending a few days in the lovely town of Greenup.
Fortunatly, i noticed a sign for a GM dealer across the street. Went over, talked to a serviceman. He came over, jumped my car, and i drove it back to the their shop. Now their shop had a gravel driveway, and i was very concerned for my keel.... however, beggers cannot be choosers, and i drove very cautiously across the lot. He tested the battery, and much to my relief confirmed it dead! Believe me, much easier to replace a battery than a saab alternator in the styx of illinois.
however, he didn't have a battery that would fix my car. so i called saab in indianapolis (110 miles ahead), and they could hook me up. they closed at 6, i had 3 hours to get there (and a full tank of gas!) after hitting much traffic at the illinois, indianapolis border (i can understand why a lot of people were fleeing that part of illinois), i rolled into the indy saab dealership, just down the road from the indy motor speedway (that place is HUGE). they replaced my battery in about 5 minutes, and i was on my way. the whole shenanigans with the battery cost me only $100 and 2 hours. i consider myself VERY lucky on that front.
Now i know you keen readers are wondering what happened to Part I? well, part I is below. This is MY musing. There's no law that says it has to be chronological
learned how to use the 'voice memo' feature on the way back, at an amarillo gas station. so i was able to leave nice voice memos to myself (since it's hard to write stuff down when driving 70) i had memos about gracie allen, george burns, birdshit, sailing, and other things which might make its way into this little writeup. ok. it's my new toy, but i think it's way cool. The speakerphone works pretty well, but the headset works even better.
this worked great in the northeast, and in california. however, in between albuquerque and st louis, the digital signal was non-existent. on their map diagram, looks like i should have had a digital signal for at least %90 percent of the trip. their map also states that i should have had coverage in the thriving metropolitan areas such as ok city, tulsa, and springfield. this was NOT the case. i felt like i could have been the annoying 'can you hear me now' guy from the commericals. the answer from the plains states would have been 'NOOOOOOO'. however, i am thankful to have had coverage in greenup, illinois (see saab story Part II)
we'll have to see what my bill looks like. But am probably going to write a letter to verizon. i WAS on the highway, and i drove right through the heart of the major cities without a signal. i was duped! (although i'm paying the same for this plan, that i did for my single-rate east which covered most areas between main and south carolina).
Almost without fail, immediately after getting back on the highway, after the 300 mile gas stop & window cleaning, i would get attacked by a bird, or smash a bug into my windshield.... They just couldn't wait until i was about to pull off the highway to do it. Felt like i was living in a Gary Larson cartoon with the target on my roof.
Actual letter i wrote saturday.
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August 31, 2002 Oklahoma Transportation Authority Miscellaneous Payments PO Box 960029 Oklahoma City, OK 73196-0029 I am a toll evader -- or I was until I wrote this check. At about 6:17 am on Wednesday August 28, 2002, I inadvertently ran the tollbooth on US 44/Will Rogers Turnpike eastbound between Tulsa and Oklahoma City. Please accept this check of $5.75 for my toll. I am very very sorry to be a toll-evader, and will never ever ever ever never do it again.
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ok. i spaced. i love those fastlane/speedpass tags. works great for me in new england, new york, and all the way down to dc. now, i didn't expect my tag to work with the oklahoma Pikepass system, and as far as i know it didnt. the difference between new england, and oklahoma is that in new england, you still have to slow down and go through a toll booth. in oklahoma, you have to 'exit' into a separate set of lanes (separated from the regular highway by jersey barriers) to pay a cash toll, or go straight through on the highway to pay via pikepass or to evade the toll ($117 fine).
well, it was 6:17 in the morning. i was awake. had gotten a great night sleep, had been on the road for over an hour, and had put down at least two diet cokes already. i knew i didn't have to get off the highway until Oklahoma City. i was focused on my next stop, focused on the 1400 miles left to boston, focused on my 75mph speed, focused on the trailer, focused on driving safely. i was listening to one of mayer's CDs -- i was IN THE ZONE.
i missed all the toll signs. I'm sure there were plenty of them. i missed them all. focused on how many miles left to ok city and to boston. i zoomed right past the tollbooths at 75mph. no way to back up, no way to repent for my toll evading sins.... i committed a criminal act, which in california is probably punishable by death! fortunately, i had a receipt and a phone number for the oklahoma transportation authority. the gentleman i spoke with was very courteous. he gave me instructions on how to pay the $5.75 toll (see above letter). he seemed all too familiar with the drill. probably not the first driver with this problem, and i'm sure not the last. the gentleman hinted that my toll will go to redesign the pikepass/toll lanes so this doesn't happen so often in the future....
seems fair to me.
If you ever run into the same problem, just call 1-800-pikepass, and they'll fix you right up.
Since i've made it home safely, i feel i can now share these details without causing any more stress. on the way out, at a rest stop in indiana, i went to grab something out of the small cooler from the floor of the back seat....
the cooler was floating....
being the smart person i am, and seeing the amount of water, i deduced that it was condensed water from the AC, and not some fluid vital for my car's operation (gasoline, brake fluid, etc....). it was only in the back seat! while this worried me, it could have been worse. fortunately, i was towing a boat, and with a bailer and a sponge, i was able to get rid of most of the water, and monitor it for the rest of the trip. each of the next 300 miles or so, i would stop for gas, relieve myself, take a short jog around the rest area, and bail out my car.
you're supposed to bail a boat, not a car :-). but it was a good routine.
Stopped for the night at a hotel between st louis and springfield. got on the internet, and found a saab service center in springfield. woke up, drove an hour. they hooked up a shop-vac and inserted it into a valve in the bottom of my car, sucked out a few leaves, and tons of water started pouring out. they opened up a couple of drains underneath the floor of my car and for 10 minutes, water at first poured, and finally trickled out of my car.... they didn't charge me a dime for the 3 minute vacuum job. they just wanted me to send them pictures of california girls (no kidding!!!!). so to john and the good guys at taliaferro imports in springfield, missouri -- THANKS!
stopped by on the way back (see picture), and dropped off a few hats. still working on getting them some shots of all the eye candy. working on writing a story for saab magazine about my road trip. will include this picture. good guys. they knew their saabs!
They set me up for the rest of the trip.
still heard some gurgling for the next 1500 miles, but little or no water. Went to a dealership in santa monica ca, hoping for a warranty job (and a new carpet), but no such luck. but they fixed the problem, and it worked great the whole trip back. After a few days in the desert, and a few afternoons in the california sun with the windows down, the formerly flooded floor dried out nicely.
And yes, i saw john hiatt perform (at the house of blues) one of the songs which mayer put on my California CD, Riding with the King. Listened to some Peter Gabriel, and Bob Dylan as well. Other than that, did a lot of books on tape, Sports/Talk radio, and FM Surfing.
Also, started listening to Chronicles of Narnia. You know, the childrens story. This version is very abridged, and didn't do the book much justice. Made it through the lion, the witch and the wardrobe, but didn't get too far into Prince Caspian. That reader's voice put me to sleep. i just may have to buy the series, and read it again. Children's books -- that's about my speed :-)
The Dilbert Principle! Very funny view of corporate america. I saw many of my former bosses and coworkers fitting into Scott Adams examples. tape two started putting me to sleep.... So, on to something else.
Ok, so i drove back days before the players were going on strike. being a fan of baseball, listening to lots of games, and getting espn radio for a fair amount of the trip, i heard lots of interviews with sports writers, and fans. i'm getting sick and tired of hearing from fans who are pissed at the players because they are getting millions for playing a childrens game. yeah, that's all true, but the strike is not necessarily all about the money. it's about principles, fairness, etc. not picking sides in the battle, because i think both the players and owners are all greedy bastards.... but i'm glad their was no strike.
go sox. the phils have had a great month, and are above .500, but are still a longshot for the playoffs, but you can't count them out.
bud selig deserves to be shot, but more so if he uses any more lame beatles references, like the 'long and winding road'
Welcome back to New England. Woke up at 7 at a PA rest stop, and it rained the rest of the trip home.
two regattas in connecticut coming up. hopefully learned something and am moving forward in my sailing. it was too long of a drive to CA to go backwards.
Thanks to Andy, Anthony, Sari, Chris, Anne, Jessica and Jeremy and others for entertaining me in California. Thanks to Dave for letting me sleep on his Catalina 30 for a month. Thanks to Ron for flying out and sailing the worlds with me, and to Chris and Louis for sailing before the worlds. Thanks to Kelly for coming out and playing in LA. And thanks to everyone for reading my self-indulgences, and sending me e-mails.
"say goodnight gracie"
"goodnight gracie"....